couldn't stop thinking

it had been about 5 days we did not meet....from the 1st day u left i started to feel that i didn't have mood to continue my work , i even didn't dare to work, i know u have a good job now but i couldn't concentrate, my brain just keep thinking of u, yes u asked me focus on my work n study but from the day u said u r gonna resign n all the things that u have been telling me i just couldn't do it. u said it like very easy,it is not easy, all the days we have gone through throughout this year i really couldn't forget, the days that we have laughs,i still remember the 1st day i came to work, i met calvin n bel 1st then followed by u n david. If that day david didn't sacrifice his place to me i wouldn't have become so close, i remembered my first day eating with u guys in star village, u r the one who drove n u were sitting opposite me,looking like didn't really like to talk to me really serious. From that day onward, i was afraid to talk to u or ask u something, the only one that i dare to ask is isabel. Slowly after we get along to each other for some times, we started to have jokes and crazy together. i couldn't forget that  the day we started to get very close is when we chat with each other in skype at home when chin said he is going to resign and we even crazy until went to isabel's bf's house and forced her to come out. The nights when we ot together, we sang songs to cover our feeling of bored for working, all these moments couldn't be deleted that easilylast year u guys had fun time during christmas, this year how can we celebrate?next year peak period  no more singing to cover the bored feeling.All the laughs and jokes started from u, without u i really dunno how to make our office full of laughs. Isabel said 1 colleague left we still can be like last time, how?! ya u can fully utilise ur time with ur new job, u have a good learning environment but things cannot be what u told me,time will slowly take up all the things,i dun even dare to talk with u right now because i know u won't understand how i fell, how many 100 times i tell u u will still give me the same thing, u can't even feel how my feeling is right now. U said relationship will appear unrealisably, how?! u think with my physical body will have ppl proppose to me? even if i become mature also will not have a single person proppose to me..timing? how old am i right now?! in ur mind i'm still young but i'm not young anymore, most of my friends got bf, wait for the timing i need until how long?! 30? 40? by the time i dun need to have my own children anymore.u think like that because u got ur own u sure said until very easy, u didn't even understand how other ppl feel?!

First day without you!

today is the first day u left us after yesterday, really not used to it, when i arrived office, see ur place and then u forgot to bring back your pillow...this is the moment where me n bel started to drop our tears, suddenly less 1 person n ur voice is not there anymore. Even now we dun dare to get the take away rice, we just feel like going out to eat,,,last time we usedto stay in office together to eat but now most of the ppl that we know resigned. we really not used to this kind of environment,,,,all the while is just quiet....i couldn't even sleep...my brain is just all u....